Tuesday, February 24, 2009

The Beard

I had a dream where I started getting a 5 o clock shadow like 5 minutes after I shaved. It then progressed into a full blown beard. So I was standing there in the bathroom checking myself out thinkin "You One Bad Ass Muthe SHUT YO MOUF!!"

The end. I then wake up to find that I do not have a beard.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Fatass Nap

So I skipped my class from Community Nutrition class and instead went home and slept. Goodness I got home at 12:30 and slept all the way until 4 something! So during my nap, I got into this dream, but I only remember parts of it, and it's not very fluid or coherent..but here goes..!

Dillon came to visit and me, him and Sherry all went to the Zoo. And on our drive back it became a van of 7 but I can't really remember who was in it. In the back it was Dillon, a hobo, and someone smaller (I'm guessing Wilton because that's how they usually sit IRL). Dillon and I were trying to be nice so we invited a homeless person onto our adventure.

We drive along the side of cliffhouse, going towards sunset. We see Anthony and pick him up. He's talking to Jane on the phone. And Calvin (his friend) suddenly became the driver. He said "oh oh! I want to talk to Jane!" and Anthony tosses the phone all the way from the back seat up to where Calvin was driving, and he catches it! And he's like, oh yeah, I'm so good. And I hear Calvin say "This is NOT Jane. Who is this?"

We get to my "house" and it's this HUGE country-side house. I get off first because I really had to pee. I get into the bathroom and I pee, and for some reason I start showering. I guess we just came back from a water park or something because everyone really wanted to shower, but I was first :)

I'm showering and everything feels like real time, where I get a chance to think about things. I start to get worried about the homeless person dirtying my bathroom. And I fantasize about telling him to rinse everything off. I had this random thought where I was wondering if it'd be like that movie where Ryan Gosling is a hobo and he cleans himself off and becomes extremely hot. (Not a real movie, but one that I made up in my dream).

I'm showering and I overhear all these people talk. First, I hear my Dad (who apparently lives in the room close to my bathroom with his wife). And he's saying, "I don't know what he's (he implying Dillon) trying to prove. He keeps saying he can buy a car because he's going to borrow money from his uncle and then pay it off. I don't think he can buy a car. (Weird thing is that Dillon was talking about buying the 1989 GTI, that he currently owns IRL) The kid's dreams are too big, who does he think he is."

And then I hear Anthony, Chad and the hobo come in. And Anthony's like, "yeah is he really going to buy that car? I mean, he keeps saying he would but is he going to buy that car?"

And then the Hobo says, "What is up with that dude? I wanted to get out of that car and he's stopping me like, 'That's a nice shirt. I want to feel that shirt. (Implying he wants to know what material it is)'"

I get out of the shower to dress and the door keeps flapping open. It's this crazy crescent moon shaped lock where you're suppose to flip it one way or another and I get really confused about it.

I'm half dressed and my sisters come into the bathroom with me because they want to change. And then Hieu is in a small tank-top, which shows her stomach, and jeans, Theresa is in her undies and Hieu OPENS THE DOOR! And I'm like "what the hell is your problem Hieu?!" And then Hieu says "She's in an invisible panda suit."

(Side note: Earlier in the dream, Dillon and I went to the zoo. I have knowledge of this but don't remember dreaming it, but it was a joke that Dillon said to me where he said that they should invent an invisible panda suit. And I'm like, why would you need one, right?)

So I'm like, no you're a fucking idiot! Close the damn door. And I guess I'm done changing because me and Hieu go outside. And Hieu is still in her tank top and jeans (which is really odd knowing that there are boys in the house and Hieu is very conservative).

I walk upstairs with Hieu to the kitchen and my mom is pouring herself some kind of juice. (The kitchen is super fancy and HUGE by the way). And me and Hieu are still arguing about the panda suit thing. And she says to me "I'm just trying to explain it in ways that you can understand." And I'm said "I understand that you're being a fucking idiot." And she keeps insisting that she's just explaining it in ways that I can understand (Btw, in this part, I get the feeling that Hieu really likes Dillon, and is apparently the only one to really like him in this dream.)

I open the fridge and I'm looking for these meals that I apparently bought from charity from before. It's a meal of fried chicken and mashed potatoes put into a brown bag. I can't really find it and I find this dish that I think we usually eat during dim sum. It's this clear jellyfish-ish thing and kinda looks like noodles, but aren't noodles. I forget what it's called or where I've encountered them.

At this point, I know I'm dreaming and I float between dream world and real world. And I thought to myself "Oh no, if I wake up I won't be able to bring the fried chicken and jellyfish.. I should just eat it in dream world first." I let myself wake up a little bit more and realized that in real life I really don't own those kinds of foods. So I go back into dream world and eat it in my huge kitchen.

And then I woke up.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

How Great would it be to have Andy, Nick and David as a Roomate

So I had a dream that was quite possibly the Holy Grails of dream world. First it started off with me going into my new house. It was a gorgeous house, a house that you would be proud to show to the Queen of England. Four bedrooms, large furnished living room, giant windows and a shine that only lemon zest could give.

I entered the house and looked around in it's wonderful glimmer of spectacular. But than it would not last long as I was opening the windows to let more light in, day became night and the house suddenly changed a bit. But it was still radical like that of a 1998 bean burrito from Taco Bell.

David entered the room and said, "Hey Dillon, I think we need to fix the bathroom over there, it's run down and filthy."

"I'll check it out," I said. I walked over to the bathroom and opened the door, which just happen to look like a refrigerator door made out of wood. The bathroom was pretty run down, mold on the wall broken walls, but interestingly enough there were three shower heads that worked when you turned on the sink knob. I looked into the mirror and to my surprise I had no reflection. I didn't think to much of it and I waved to the mirror, than bam Christoper's reflection was in the mirror and he waved back to me.

Horrified by the event I ran out of the bathroom. I was met by my righteous roomates David, Nick and Andy. Oh for Angel's sake this Andy is Chad's Andy, yeah that's right eye candy galore. I was scared out of my shoe laces and I asked them what to do. Luckily Gary and Chadwick showed up. Apparently Gary is a licensed Exorcist and he was there to save the day.

"What seems to be the problem Dillon?" Chadwick said.
"I think our house is huanted by the ghost of Christopher."

Gary walks over, dressed ever so fashionably, blue jacket, scarf and a pair of white slacks, "Wait I have a question for David," he said. "David have you been wearing Andy's clothes?"

"What why would I wear Andy's clothes?" David said with a hint of he knew he was caught but maybe he should give lying a shot just to see where it takes him.

"Come on David this is important," Gary said.

"Alright, alright, I've been wearing Andy's clothes for my dates.

"Oh man! NO WAY! Come on DAVID!" Andy said with much soul and passion for his soiled clothes.

So we all go to the basement because Gary is going to do some kind of Ghost busting thing that I have no idea about, but hey atleast we get to see the basement, which I had no idea I had in my dream. To my surprise in the basement was Henry in an office like enviroment, which was my basement but it looked like a real office I even think it had a balcony window, which to many made no sense. Henry was crunching numbers, specifically doing Chadwick's taxes. Henry gets angry because he says he never gets to have fun with us and he's stuck in his dead end job as Chadwick's accountant.

Than after some walking around Lily shows up at the stair case, but Lily is a ghost. Everyone gets scared and runs to Henry's desk. Gary being the professional ghost buster he is pulls a cup out of his sleeves, like literally like in the olden day Chinese films where people keep their entire family fortune up one sleeve. He pulls out a cup and pours some cinnamon in the cup than he hurls the cup and Lily. The cup shatters like an exploding bag of M&M's and the cinnamon sprinkles on to Lily like Pixie dust. This turn's her back into a human and we talk for a little bit, some jokes are thrown out here and there, small talk between irrelevant characters and we go back upstairs.

As we enter the living room Christopher shows up only he's not a ghost but real Christopher. I look at him like I've just seen Natalie Portman naked and I manage to say "What?"

Christopher looks at me and says dude we're roomates, why the heck did you run off when you saw me. So all in all Christopher was not the ghost who was living in my house he was my other roomate. On a side note the characters, Dillon (me), Chadwick, David and Christopher were in their younger age's, probably around middle school. But everyone else was their current age. The dream ends with all of us hanging out in the house, which turns into a beach house, pretty awesome if you ask anybody who would want to own a house.

But I hope you guys enjoy my dream, I do apoplogize for the length because clearly we live in a day where going over a paragraph in a blog would be taboo. Also I apopologize if I offend anyone in my dream, I take full responsiblity for the imaginary images of my sleep. Also I would like to post warn you for my language, I didn't mean to sound like a man marketing Taco Bell. But if you need a dinner, lunch, late night snack, breakfast, midnight meal or just some darn good fast food go to Taco bell and order yourself the Crunch Wrap Supreme. I gurantee you if you thought honey on waffles was genius wait till you have the Crunch Wrap Supreme.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Midafternoon Nap

I had a dream that I had two random roommates at my apartment that I never really get to see. One of them was walking out of the restroom area, which is apparently his room and he's carrying his bike and he's dressed like a marathon biking person, with the tight shorts and the helmet.

I'm standing in the kitchen and he tells me that he's just about to leave the house and if I went to Safeway yet. I think I just woke up from my nap.. in my dream so I was kind of out of it. And he told me I should stock up because there's a hurricane/big storm that's suppose to hit Davis and I grab lots of water.

Sunday, February 8, 2009

jlam DREAMS

Is this a blog for dreams?
Cuz I've been sleeping a lot lately (and I mean A LOTTTTTt) so I've had a bunch of pretty intense dreams.

This morning before I decided to finally wake up (from maybe about 18 hours of sleeping) I was in a dream where huge bees were villains of the world, and they were maybe ten times the size of humans. In one scene I'm in an underground parking garage trying to escape the bees after an attempt to sabotage their headquarters. In a maze of parked cars, I get into my car (really cool, all-white antique-looking car but all pimped out) but since its my car, they're able to "smell"/"sense" me, so they attack and puncture the roof of my car. I get out and I run towards these light pink/light blue mopeds and flatter-looking cars that belong to the bees that don't fly (because if they can't fly, then they drive mopeds/flattish cars instead). I purposely run through these densely-packed cars because the oversize-bee-that-can't-fly whose trying to whack me with its huge-over-sized stinger is destroying its motorcade of mopeds...it's whacking and destroying the wheels on its own cars (stupid over-sized bee)...since I'm too quick for it. I'm almost through with destroying their mopeds/cars when a flying bee catches me and lifts me up into the air. But I'm too smart: I pull out a baby-bee from my pocket. The flying bee freaks out that I have a baby bee, and it starts to fly me towards the nursery to return the baby. But I'm so slick: I direct the flying bee by flinging the baby bee in the direction that I want it to fly. I eventually reach my teammates, I drop the baby bee, so the flying bee drops me. And of course, one of my teammates can shoot fire from her fingers, so she shoots fire at the flying bee and kills it. Then, to prevent the baby bee form causing trouble, I shoot tar from my fingers (yea, its a new power to me) to surround/cage the baby bee. To continue with the escape, I break into a blue/orange antique-looking car (that's not mine, since it doesn't carry my scent). The bees can't tell its me, and I successful escape from the underground parking garage.

First thought after waking up from dream: shooting-tar-from-fingers power is lame. Need another power next time.

The dream before the bees is one where I "kill" a man, but I didn't mean to. He stole a ChowSingChee vcd from me, so of course, I chase him down, jump on his back, and squeeze his neck so that he'll let go of my vcd. Then, all of a sudden he's dead. I'm part of a gang family and they're convinced some other gang is trying to get me to "eat the dead cat," so they investigate. The cops also investigate. But I can't let the cops know I'm from a gang, otherwise they'll never believe that I'm innocent.

Too bad I can't remember the end of this dream. I think it was good.

Until I dream again.
-jlam

Friday, February 6, 2009

10 Childhood Memories

Reading 25 silly facts (or lies) made me think of random childhood moments. Here are ten for you few bloggerillas.

293. My brother and I used to really like playing around with the flabby skin underneath my grandma's chin. Gross now, but that skin was so soft no facial product could ever give you that!

344. When I was a kid, I wanted to be an artist, singer, dancer, pianist, writer, olympic swimmer and diver.

Here's a glimpse of a typical daydream:

My friend brought me into her recording studio to do some work. Browsing around the area for entertainment, I found sheet music to a familiar song. I started singing with my awesome voice after my friend left the room. She came back moments later, mesmerized, and advised me to sing foreal. Well, you know how the rest goes...I became a superstar.

45. In fifth grade, these two random white chicks asked me to join their rock band. I wonder how far I would've gone with that if I had said yes.

3. Either my barbie's head fell off or I ripped it off, but I really liked playing with her hair. I would try to somehow stylize her hair, tie/clip it in crazy ways, and cut it. Maybe I secretly wanted to be a hair stylist.

28. Screw tag, man. I played pretend-olden-chinese-days-fighting-and-saving-my-"hing dai's." When we got "hurt," we'd sit behind each other and heal the other by pressing our palms against his/her back.

98. But then, I also really liked playing tag...regular tag, freeze tag, cartoon tag. I was pretty damn good at it too. I never really thought this, but I guess being chased is a fun feeling. That might explain all the chasing dreams...

109. I've probably told some of you about my recurring dreams of flying over mountains and jumping big flights of stairs. These started since I was in preschool, except in those days, I would be jumping over playground stairs (?) and railings (I was really high up!). You know what that means--flying's my superpower.

45. For awhile in first grade, I would tell my mom "I hate school" (she met this with asian-mother-angry-concern). I only said that because that's what all the cool kids say. There was always a tiny bit of nerd in me, and I never minded school at all. Now that I'm going to graduate, I think I'm going to miss it a lot.

587. I don't think I tried to be different as a kid, but I also didn't like hopping on the bandwagon. I used to frown upon my friends when they started wearing flare pants because I thought they're becoming like the rest of the girls out there. Baggy jeans were the best way to go!

That also kinda explains why I don't want to write 25 stupid facts about me on facebook. (oh, semi-hyprocritical me =))

68. I went to a sacred waterfall area in Japan when I was in middle school. There were three separate streams representing intelligence, beauty, and happiness, and we were only allowed to take one sip out the stream we felt was most important. I chose to drink the happiness water, and my dad asked me why. I told him that the other two won't matter as long as you're happy. He thought that I was very mature and smart for thinking that, and to this day, it was the best choice. I hope you bloggerilees find that happiness is the most important too!

(Drinking out of all three streams meant you were greedy. Therefore, you would get nothing from drinking this. I guess my dad didn't break that rule, but he did go fill up his whole water bottle with happiness.)

Now that I'm done writing about my younger days, I can write about my future-- yay personal statement fun!

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Hieu's testimony

Happened on friday
"I don't want to watch it!"
Apparently I sounded really angry

Chadsleeptalk

Just a blog to log my dreams, sleep talks, weird happy haps, etc